That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
