There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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