Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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