I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
