You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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