How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
