Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Buhtt sex?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
