woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
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if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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