So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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