billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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