butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
