That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
