"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I need a beard to bite.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
