Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
