So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
