Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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