hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Randomize