so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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