I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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