marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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