Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
