Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
i dont even know how to be here
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
