she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
