I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
