my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize