Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
