My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
