i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
