why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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