Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
50% drunk capacity currently
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize