I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Randomize