This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
ugly people sure do ruin things
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
