I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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