O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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