Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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