does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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