awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You ruined the universe
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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