You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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