I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
