i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize
