They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
