I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
