why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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