I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
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