She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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