That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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