areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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