i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
