hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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