Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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