FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
