At least make sure they are 18
Why
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize