new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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